September 30, 2025

Dr. Leslie Davis: Why Smart Women Stay in Bad Relationships

Episode 59
“We get to the point of self silencing that we are invisible to other people.”

Dr. Leslie Davis: Why Smart Women Stay in Bad Relationships

Episode 59

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"And when you get into that routine of making sure everybody else is okay and you're not filling your own cup, then you're empty. And I think at that point, if it goes on for too long, that's where silencing happens naturally, where you have no words for yourself because you've given it to everyone else."

In this powerful episode of the She Lift Project Podcast, host Cynthia Kirkpatrick welcomes Dr. Leslie Davis, a relationship therapist, owner of Eva Empowered, and international speaker. Dr. Davis specializes in helping women heal from toxic relationships, increase self-worth, and walk in freedom by knowing their truth. The conversation explores self-silencing among women, recognizing toxic relationship patterns, and the unique mental health challenges facing single mothers.

This episode is for any woman who feels like she’s shrinking herself to fit into relationships, whether romantic, professional, or familial. Listeners will learn to identify the signs of toxic dynamics including gaslighting, love bombing, and codependency, understand why self-silencing is so damaging, and discover practical strategies for having difficult conversations. After listening, you’ll be equipped to recognize when you’re making yourself invisible, know how to ask for help without feeling like a burden, and start building healthier connections in all areas of your life.

Guest Contact Information

Dr. Leslie Davis

Dr. Leslie Davis, LCPC, NCC

Therapist & Owner
Eva Empowered

Links from the Episode

Show Notes

 

Opening & Mission (0:25 – 2:17) – 1 min 52 sec

Introduction to Dr. Davis, Eva Empowered, empowering women to heal from toxic relationships

High-Achieving Women & Olivia Pope Syndrome (2:17 – 4:18) – 2 min 1 sec

Working with women successful everywhere except relationships, unrecognized trauma

Single Motherhood Mental Health Crisis (4:50 – 6:54) – 2 min 4 sec

She Matters movement, Springfield IL story, mental health struggles, Tyler Perry movie reference

Introduction to Self-Silencing (7:03 – 7:56) – 53 sec

Support is huge, acknowledging struggle, getting help

CORE: What is Self-Silencing (7:14 – 9:16) – 2 min 2 sec ⭐ TOP CLIP

Definition, research-backed link to depression and suicide, emotional moment with host

Society’s Message to Women (10:16 – 11:11) – 55 sec

Women as nurturers, giving to everyone else, emptying your cup

Making Yourself Small to Stay Safe (11:11 – 13:15) – 2 min 4 sec ⭐ TOP CLIP

Abuse requiring silence, becoming invisible, staying small for safety

Jiu-Jitsu for Empowerment (13:15 – 15:50) – 2 min 35 sec ⭐ TOP CLIP

9-year journey, perfect for women who self-silence, body awareness, defending yourself

Women Supporting Women (15:50 – 18:28) – 2 min 38 sec

Evolution of women’s rights, nurturing each other, WOO groups, entrepreneur loneliness

Teaching Through Sharing (18:28 – 21:24) – 2 min 56 sec

Different ways to teach, planting seeds, mentoring, modeling

“For Such a Time As This” – Finding Purpose (19:55 – 21:32) – 1 min 37 sec

Dr. Debbie Turner mentorship, Esther 4:14, knowing you’re in your purpose

Called at Age 13 (21:32 – 24:26) – 2 min 54 sec ⭐ TOP CLIP

Seventh grade advice, studying relationships, single parent home, becoming a relationship therapist

Seeing Bad Relationships Everywhere (24:26 – 25:48) – 1 min 22 sec

Being transparent, pointing out red flags, matching couples who got married

Is Relationship Therapy Newer? (25:48 – 27:07) – 1 min 19 sec

Difference from couples/marriage therapy, helping all types of relationships

Why Relationships Are Harder Now (27:07 – 31:44) – 4 min 37 sec

Not Knowing How to Deal with Conflict (30:41 – 31:44) – 1 min 3 sec

Childhood conditioning, wearing out curiosity, self-silencing roots

Traditional Families & Hidden Conflict (31:44 – 33:10) – 1 min 26 sec

Not arguing in front of kids, teens finding voice, perceived disrespect

How to Have Difficult Conversations (33:10 – 36:09) – 2 min 59 sec ⭐ TOP CLIP

Teens & Emotional Intelligence (36:09 – 38:54) – 2 min 45 sec

Kids better at EI, using language, social media influence, helping parents

Gen X & Emotions Wheel (38:54 – 39:45) – 51 sec

Identifying real emotions, wheel of emotions, what’s underneath anger

New Emotion-Tracking App (39:45 – 40:05) – 20 sec

Too short standalone, but good B-roll topic

What Women Struggle With Most (40:05 – 42:07) – 2 min 2 sec

Toxic relationships defined: can’t be yourself, numbness, codependency, feeling needed

Subtle vs. Loud Toxic Relationships (41:29 – 42:07) – 38 sec

Short but important point – good for social snippet

Gaslighting Explained (42:07 – 42:44) – 37 sec

Definition: questioning reality, manipulation tool, boss/friend/family can gaslight

Gaslighters vs. Narcissists (42:44 – 44:59) – 2 min 15 sec

Control issues, diagnosable narcissism, toxic environment signs, behavioral changes

“They’re Not Always Bad” – The Confusion (44:59 – 46:25) – 1 min 26 sec

Why people stay, not always toxic, making excuses, staying too long

The Mask Abusers Wear (46:25 – 48:46) – 2 min 21 sec ⭐ TOP CLIP

Gradual reveal, control tactics, abuse cycle, “I didn’t mean it”

How to Break Free (48:46 – 49:03) – 17 sec

Transition clip

Education & Healthy Examples (49:03 – 50:42) – 1 min 39 sec

Awareness, choosing different, attracted to what you know, surrounded by healthy people

Dr. D’s Own Experience (47:45 – 48:46) – 1 min 1 sec

Already captured in “Mask” clip above

Stories That Save Lives (49:03 – 51:15) – 2 min 12 sec

Single moms feeling safe, breaking down, never having support, goal to save a life

We’re Not Alone (51:15 – 52:22) – 1 min 7 sec

Sharing stories, all making mistakes, getting help, finding right people

You’re Not a Burden (52:22 – 53:22) – 1 min ⭐ TOP CLIP #1 PRIORITY

“You don’t get to decide you’re a burden” – the most powerful quote

Creating Support Groups (51:50 – 52:31) – 41 sec

Don’t need to be professional, start from experience

Small Acts Matter (52:31 – 53:05) – 34 sec

Meals, childcare, smiles, questions

Honest Answers (53:05 – 53:45) – 40 sec

Releasing burden fears, right person/setting

Don’t Decide For Others (53:45 – 54:05) – 20 sec

Don’t prevent people from helping you

Building Business & Getting Hacked (54:05 – 56:38) – 2 min 33 sec

TikTok ban, losing accounts since 2007, blessing in disguise, rebranding, YouTube channel

Keep Pushing Forward – Cody Sanchez (56:38 – 57:16) – 38 sec

Do it now, capitalize on ideas

Vision Boards & Writing Things Down (57:16 – 58:23) – 1 min 7 sec ⭐ TOP CLIP

Dreaming since childhood, vision boards, visual reminders, choosing your path

Word of the Year: Refinement (58:23 – 59:19) – 56 sec

Lost accounts early in year of “refinement,” many things fitting the word

Who to Work With & How to Find Dr. D (59:19 – 1:01:06) – 1 min 47 sec

Anyone wanting healthy relationships, all platforms, Cadre app, Tuesday coffee chats

Closing: Relationship with Self (1:01:06 – 1:01:40) – 34 sec

Building better relationship with yourself first, appreciation for sharing

Content Notice

This podcast and all She Lift Project content represents the opinions of Cynthia Kirkpatrick and her guests. The content here is for informational purposes only, and should not be taken as professional advice – financial, legal, medical, or otherwise.

Views and opinions expressed in the podcast and across all She Lift Project media channels are our own and do not represent that of our places of work. While we make every effort to ensure that the information we are sharing is accurate, we welcome any comments, suggestions, or correction of errors.

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